Am having the time of the month, estrogen tak cukup (yaka?) hence a bit emotional (bukan vice-versa?) Entahla...Had period pain, dah dua hari...today my cramps are not as bad, but the back pain is getting worse. Not sure whether it is the real back pain, or camouflage by period pain. And at times like this I hope I have somebody that can help me ease the pain, I just need someone to rub my back.
Yesterday, I was on sick leave, food supplies was running low, I ran out of rice. Not in the mood to be creative. Despite the pain, I still need to gather some strength and go out to buy food. Pathetic, I know. But what can I do?
But when I think again, maybe I don't deserve any of it. Maybe Allah has not given it to me because it was not mine to begin with. I mean, what kind of burden would I be to a man, having to face my cramps month in and month out? What about this back pain that would never ever go away? I doubt if I am ever able to perform my duty as a wife, with a broken hips probably..hahahaha...
Seriously, if I am a man, I would not even consider taking myself as a wife, not with this condition. So how do I move on? Stop hoping for anything to happen. I take care of myself. No matter what happen.
Posted by
Lavender
